I haven’t done bad today on my eating and I intend on continuing with this. I am taking it one day at a time, sometimes one hour at a time. I worked out 4 days this week and feel great about that.
I am missing my daughter something fierce right now and when I think about it too much I get really depressed. I remember her senior year and how much we did together, how much I wanted for it to be perfect for her. I never had enough money but I always managed to give her what she needed. We got senior pictures and she did all the fun senior things and I still felt like I fell short. I loved and still love her so much. I don’t understand why she is choosing to turn her back on me when it hurts me so much. I would never judge her the way that she is judging me.
I wish I was starting my new job tomorrow. I think he will call this week though. I’m so ready. I will be working on Craigs list stuff tonight and tomorrow T. is off so we will be spending the day together <3 I’m excited about that. We may be going to the movies or may be just staying home. We have to get the pool in shape, it’s almost time for swimming. We are such wimps, the pool has to really warm up before we’ll get in it. I’m feeling happy and ready for the summer.
Life is beautiful, I love my life and it couldn’t be any better right now. Last night the meeting was on the first step. I am powerless over so many things in my life but the one thing I do have control over is my reactions to things and I choose to be happy. Right now and in this moment I am happy. Things are damn near perfect except for what’s happening with my daughter. I can’t change her feelings but I can choose to not get completely discouraged. I’m working on a letter for her. I just haven’t got it quite right yet. I want it to be perfect.