Friday, May 1, 2009

Early Morning Thoughts With My Coffee

It is wonderful to get up early, at least for me. I am enjoying the luxury of waking up with the birds and not having anywhere too pressing to be. I do have an Alanon meeting at 10 am but that's a ways off. I have no job to rush to yet in my world and it's nice to just get up and enjoy the morning.

I was up at 5:30 this morning, I set the clock for 6:30 and it went off an hour earlier. The clock was reset at some point to the wrong time. I am ok with that. I am NOT ok with the fact that the thermostat reads almost 80 degrees this early in the morning but what can I do about that anyway? Not much. There is no wind which is great because it annoys me but not so great because it isn't here to keep the temps down. I really like opening the doors and letting the beautiful morning air inside. I'll have to stop doing that soon enough.

It's a gorgeous morning, no wind to speak of and there are a few clouds in the sky to take the glare of the sun down a notch. I am feeling very hopeful.

My sister is going through an awful divorce with her husband. The man that has always been so kind and gentle to her is turning into a monster at the realization of losing her. He called me yesterday and started venting. After listening to him, and then listening to her I finally told him when he called back that I could not discuss this stuff with him because, well, she is my sister and I love her and she comes first to me. Setting a boundary. It made me feel bad for him but that's what I have to do.

I detest being in the middle. I really hate that she is going through such heartache. It's a battlefield and I guess I have chosen her side. Her husband left me a nasty message when T. and I went to get ice cream. I guess he's mad at me now. That's always my problem, I don't like for people to get mad at me. I hate it. I would rather make peace and everyone just be happy and get along. Sadly, life isn't like that.

Today I am chairing the meeting and the topic is Step and Tradition Five. I know a lot about these things so it won't be hard for me to share on them. I am a little concerned that stalker girl will be there but I will not let it ruin my serenity. I must find a way to accept this person just as she is. That's what Alanon has been teaching me.

I was sad to read that Sunny is leaving us. But I do understand the need to live real life. I have left blogging behind many times to be present in my life. It was becoming an addiction for me too. I am now trying to find a balance. I have many more real life friends that are back in my world and many new ones too. It happened because I was able to put down my laptop and get out there and live my life a little bit. And also using the phone and answering it when it rings. But I was able to get in contact with 3 of my best girlfriends through facebook. I adore facebook. I love that I have been able to renew some old friendships through there. And of course now I am feeling like blogging again which is a wonderful thing.

In a few days it will be the anniversary of my Dad's death. I can't believe it's been a year already. I still miss him and I'm still sad that he suffered alone. But I don't have this sense of impending doom like with other deaths I've experienced. I am in Acceptance about his death. That is a great place to be.

Well, I'm off to read a few blogs and get ready for my workout. I hope Friday is fantastic for everyone. I'm sure it will be for me.

11 comments:

Fijufic said...

I blog from Monday through Friday. I should consider taking some of your advice and staying away a little more.

I am jammed at work and work must come first.

Bobby

greeneyes67 said...

I understand Bobby. I find a break from time to time helps me. But I always come back to my online world eventually. I hope Sunny does too.

Xanadu said...

So great to see you blog again. Blogging may be an addiction, but it's not necessairily a BAD addiction. I've met friends through it, and have become close to many people, that I otherwise wouldn't have had the opportunity to. I don't drive, so it's hard for me to get out at the snap of a finger.

You seem to have balance in your life, and are living it to the fullest. Good for you.

I still miss my dad, too, and he passed away in '06. Just treasure the memories of good times. Hugs.

girly said...

It's sunny and 60 here right now, I think you would like the fresh spring air. I know I would like the insta-warmth of your weather!

becomingkate said...

I can't believe how hot it is there! Today is warm, but maybe in the high 60's.
Nice to see you! *hugs*

Cygnus MacLlyr said...

I hear you-- and am with you-- on not liking anyone upset-- at me or anyone else! lol!
Sorry you're in the middle of it all-- but family was the right choice.
Have a great May Day, Lady Greeneyes!!!

Cin said...

Miss you! I am so behind on catching up with everyone.Stalker girl? That sounds creepy..love ya

Doug said...

I am trying to taper off my blogging. I don't worry about reading as soon as someone updates, just as I don't get as many readers as I used to.

The real world has so many more possibilities for interest, eh?

greeneyes67 said...

yes it does Doug. I do miss you though.

Dorrie said...

I'm glad you posted again... I like reading these type of entries more then those short, telegraph messages on facebook.

Oh, and I like the pictures in the above entry. You are sounding so much more relaxed! Sorry the problems with your sister have gotten so ugly. {{{hugs}}}

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